She smiled and left upstairs, Yash discreetly following behind her. Vaidehi closed the bedroom door and sank onto the floor, her back against the side of the bed. She stared forward unseeingly. Seconds later, the door opened, and Yash entered. He sank down next to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“Bhai, yeh sab mujhe bigaad rahe hain. Itna laad pyaar jo mere sasuraal wale mujhe dete hain. Pehle toh main bohot khush thi. Kabhi aisa party nahi ki, phir bhi aap sab ke saath, Radhika aur Shraddha ke saath, apni birthday enjoy karti thi. Pata hain, main abhi bohot khush hoon. Kyunki ab bhi aap sab hain mere paas, aur toh aur ek naya family bhi hain.”

(Bhai, everyone is spoiling me. All the love that my in-laws show me. I was really happy before. I never had parties like this, but still I enjoyed my birthday with all you, with Radhika and Shraddha. Do you know, I’m really happy right now. Because I still have all of you with me, and now I have a new family, too.)

Worried Yash might take the statement the wrong way, she immediately added, “Please, aisa mat sochiye ki pehle main kam khush thi. Aisa nahi hain, bas apni khushi aur logon ke saath mana rahi hoon. Lekin aaj, pehli baar, mujhe thoda bura lag raa hain. Matlab, main soch rahi hoon ki bura lagne doon ki nahi. Aap samajh rahe hain?” She continued without waiting for an answer.

(Please, don’t think I wasn’t as happy before. It’s not like that; It’s just that I now have more people to celebrate my happiness with. But today, for the first time, I feel a little bad. I mean, I’m debating whether I should let myself feel that way. Do you understand?)

“Maa aur Papa nahi aaye, aur Raghuveer bhi. Pura din mujhe kuch bura nahi laga, lekin ab kyun bura lag raha hain? Arey maine toh socha hi nahi ki kisi ko mere janamdin yaad rahega, aur tab bhi main khush thi. Ab kyun bura lag raha hain? Haan, bachpan se Maa aur Papa humare saath reh kar bhi humare saath nahi the. Hum donon ne khud ko pala hain. Lekin phir Maitreyi aur Nitesh aaye, aur Radhika, Shraddha, aur Avinash. Aur in sab ke parivaar walon ne bhi mujhe accept kiya. Abhi Malhotras bhi hain. Phir bhi kyun mujhe yeh akelaapan sataane aata hain?

(Mom and Dad didn’t come, and neither did Raghuveer. Arey, I didn’t even think that anyone would remember my birthday, and I was happy then, too. So, why do I feel bad now? Yes, since childhood our parents have been with us physically, but not emotionally. We both raised ourselves. Then Maitreyi and Nitesh came, and Radhika, Shraddha, and Avinash. And everyone in their families accepted me, too. Now I have the Malhotras, too. Still, why does this loneliness return to haunt me?)

I feel that I am ungrateful, that I have so many loving people around me and still I feel this loneliness. I think that I’ve succeeded in getting rid of it, that I have all my emotions under control. But suddenly, it rears its head, reminding me that it will never leave me.” A single tear dripped down her face at the struggle she was having with herself. 

“Mujhe yeh jung phirse nahi ladna hain. Main dukh nahi mehsoos karna chahti hoon. Sirf khush rehna chahti. Meri khushi sirf meri haathon mein hain na? Main apni khushi ko kas ke pakad akr rakhna chahti hoon. I don’t ever want to be sad or disappointed again. I’ve been given so many blessings to be happy, to be grateful for. I can’t let myself have expectations from anyone but myself, do you understand? But who am I kidding? I’m failing my own expectation to be happy.”

(I don’t want to fight this war again. I don’t want to feel pain. I only want to be happy. My happiness is only in my hands right? I want to hold tight onto my happiness. I don’t ever want to be sad or disappointed again. I’ve been given so many blessings to be happy, to be grateful for. I can’t let myself have expectations from anyone but myself, do you understand? But who am I kidding? I’m failing my own expectation to be happy.)

“Bilkul nahi. You know, Vaidu? You can feel pain and happiness at the same time. Even more, dukh hone se bhi khush ho sakte hain. Zindagi ek swad se nahi jee jaa sakti hain. Har ehsaas ko mehsoos karna hain, aur uss har pal se khushi lena hain. You know, I feel the same loneliness, and I don’t think it’s something that ever goes away. It’s a product of our childhood, of the way we grew up. And it’s not just us, but everyone in the world feels some brand of loneliness, no matter how many loving people they have in our lives. Just remember, that we are all here with you. Whenever you’re feeling lonely, come to us. Let us be with you. Aur bigaadne ki baat – bilkul bigad nahi rahi ho tum. You’re finally finding your normal.

(Not at all. You know Vaidu? You can feel pain/sadness and happiness at the same time. Even more, you can feel happiness in your pain. You can’t live life with just one flavor. You have to feel every emotion, and take happiness from each of those moments. You know, I feel the same loneliness…)

It is normal, and you should have expectations from your loved ones. Forget about the rest of the world, but part of embracing your loved ones is expecting things from them, too. We didn’t get any love from any of the elders in our family. So, we’ve learnt to live without emotional expectations. But I’m learning that you should ask your elders to remember and wish you and bless you on your birthday. You should expect your husband to be with you on your special day. Now if these don’t happen? How you react is up to you. But it’s absolutely not wrong to wish for them in the first place, gudiya.”

“I feel like we’ve switched places, Bhai. I always used to give you emotional lectures, lekin aaj aap mujhe samjhaarahe hain.”

(But now you’re lecturing me.)

Yash kissed his sister’s forehead then got up. “Aur who bhi tumhari kahi hui baaton se.”

(And that too with the words you’ve said to me.)

“Change quickly, let’s go down and have some cake. I’ll see you downstairs.” As Yash headed out the door, he bumped into his brother-in-law. “Please, don’t burden Vaidehi with any more drama. Let her enjoy the rest of her birthday in peace.” “There’s no drama, Yash. I promise. I only came to apologize.” Yash nodded after staring hard at him for a minute. “Vaidu always said that everyone needs a second chance.” He allowed Raghuveer to step through the doorway. Vaidehi was still in the same position, ruminating over her brother’s words. Raghuveer kneeled in front of her and clasped her hands in his, making her look up. “I’m sorry, Vaidehi.” 

In the living room a few minutes ago: 

“Uss pyaari baachi ko dekh Raghuveer. Knowing that you had us plan this party, knowing that you attended another event and apparently with another woman, she hasn’t said anything. She was only worried that we were worried about you. She’s waiting for you to explain before judging. Just think about how lucky you are, beta.”

(Just look at that poor girl, Raghuveer.)

“I know, Maa. And I promise you all, the situation is not as it seems. Trust in me this time, like you have every other time, and I won’t let you down. But let me apologize to my wife first.”

Chandrika reluctantly nodded, agreeing. Ranvijay added, “You better have a damned good explanation.” Raghuveer took that as his cue and sprinted upstairs. About to knock on the door, he heard conversation filtering through the partially open doorway. Although he had doubted it before, now he was sure that Vaidehi didn’t have a normal childhood. She had been neglected and denied the love that he had grown up in. Still, she was so strong and loving. 

“I’m sorry, Vaidehi. Will you give me a chance to explain?” A moment of charged silence passed before she answered. “Of course, but…” “Thank you. You don’t know how much I wanted to be here, with you. I even left early from work, but there was a mix-up that I didn’t imagine could ever happen. One of our senior directors, Mr. Mehrotra, was supposed to represent us at this business event…”

“Yadav, the boss is attending today’s event instead of Mr. Advani. Let his driver know.” “Yes, sir!” The gangly intern nodded eagerly, showing the same enthusiasm for the most menial tasks, as well as financial chakravyuhs. He bounded down the stairs to the office garage, and was met with Mr. Malhotra’s company car pulled up to front. He had wondered which boss Prakash sir was talking about.

He had the habit of referring to most of the seniors as ‘boss’, but always got irritated when he asked which boss? He expected the interns to read his mind, or so it seemed to Yadav. Well, his dilemma was solved. It looked like the big boss, aka Malhotra, was ready to leave. He’d just inform the driver and job done! “Excuse me, aap Malhotra sir ke driver hain na?”

(Excuse me, are you Malhotra sir’s driver?)

“Ji…”

(Yes…)

The driver looked at him with polite inquiry. “Sir aapko yeh batana chahthe the ki change of plan hain, unko ek business event mein jaana hain, aur yeh hain address.”

(Sir wanted to tell you that there’s a change of plan. He needs to go to an event, and here’s the address.)

The driver looked at him with mild suspicion, but accepted the intern’s words, because of Malhotra sir’s call from just a few moments ago. “Raju…maine yeh batane ke liye call kiya ki plan badla hain, mujhe-ek minute…Come in, Advani…Raju, line par ho?...Theek hain neeche aake bataunga.”

Raghuveer exited the elevator into the garage and smoothly slid inside the SUV before the driver could walk around and hold the door open for him. Raju was the company driver, not his personal driver. Murthy, his personal driver, had taken leave as his children were sick. Veer had only ridden with Raju a few times, and Raju wasn’t entirely familiar with Veer’s behavior or protocol.

“Sir, the intern told me about the change of plans-” “Oh really? Then let’s get going, I don’t want to be late. And Raju, I’ll be taking a nap. After all the meetings, I look haggard, and I wouldn’t want to show up with this worn-out face, would I?” Shocked into silence at the fact that his employer could both smile and crack a joke, Raju nodded, shook his head, then started the car.

The separator rolled up, and Raghuveer leaned back against the cushions to do exactly as he had said, take a nap. It had been a harrowing day of meetings. Some clients had pushed forward their meetings to today, which he had accepted when he didn’t know it was his wife’s birthday. When he asked his PA to settle his schedule last-minute, the best he could do was to shorten the meetings and schedule them back-to-back so Veer could finish early. Mentally face-palming himself at his lack of foresight, Veer grudgingly sat through the meeting marathon.

How did Raju…? He had informed his PA that he would call Raju himself, since the driver wasn’t as familiar with him and may not trust anyone else’s messages. It seemed his ever-efficient PA also sent down an intern with a message, but it heartened Veer to know that Raju was professional enough to confirm any change of plans before taking off. He was a fairly new hire, and it was always reassuring to see his employees’ work ethic firsthand. Ah, now he could relax. Veer could feel the smile on his face, unwilling to suppress it now that he was in private. He wanted to be completely present for his wife’s birthday, first birthday after their marriage, and especially not fall asleep face-first into her cake. Which was a possibility at the rate Morpheus was claiming him.

“Sir, hum aa gaye.”

(Sir, we’re here.)

Raju’s voice sounded loud and clear through the phone against his ear. Groggily, Veer forced his eyes open and rolled down the screen, cutting the call. “Thank you, Raju. For both times.” Raju had the foresight to call him ten minutes earlier, to warn him that they would be arriving. But in his drowsy state, ten minutes passed by in a blink. Taking a minute to rub his face awake and set himself to rights in the mirror, Raghuveer stepped out of the vehicle with his public persona firmly tucked away. As soon as he stepped out, he knew something was majorly wrong. Everything slowed as he registered two things, paparazzi and a business party. His stoic expression was back up in a flash and ignoring the implications, opened the door to get right back in the car again.

Unfortunately, a sultry voice reached his ear while a surprisingly strong arm wrapped itself around his like a snake and tugged with ferocity. She could barely move him with that tug of hers, but Raghuveer did deign to turn his head and bestow a thoroughly irritated look on Myra, the bane of his existence. As a business associate, he had admired her tenacity, but it was exactly that quality that he had come to hate when it became clear that she wanted a promotion from simply being a business associate. He leaned in closer, so no one standing nearby would have even the slightest chance of overhearing his words. “Myra, I really don’t have the time for this. You’d better let go of me yourself before I shake off your hand like a leech. I’m sure the paparazzi would have a field day over that, wouldn’t they?”

Myra, smart woman that she was, despite her refusal to leave him alone, heard the clear menace in his tone and slowly unwound her arm. With a slight wave and an overbright smile that clearly promised retribution, she stepped back enough for Veer to close the door in her face. “Ghar, Raju. Immediately.”

(Home, Raju. Immediately.)

“Sir?” “Ghar jaana hain, Raju. And on the way, please do explain how we ended up here.”

(We’re headed home, Raju…)

In barely a minute, he had been drained of all the energy he shored up during his restorative nap. Surprised his family hadn’t yet bombarded him with calls and messages, he dug his phone out of his pocket. They were both on silent. ‘Fucking hell, what a joke.’ Since he’d had back-to-back meetings, and had no intention of humoring any other work-related requests, he’s kept his work phone switched off the whole day. Veer usually turned on his personal phone as he left the office, but in his hurry, it had slipped his mind. ‘God, what a day.’ Of course, Veer arrived extremely late, and was rightfully faced with censure by his family. This is what people meant when they said ‘life is what happens when you make plans.’